Liban [suite]

Why Lebanese Can't Be Terrorists.....

1. We are always late;we would have missed all 4 flights.

2. Pretty girls on the plane would distract the majority.

3. We would talk loudly and bring attention to ourselves.

4. With food and drinks on the plane, we would forget why we're
there.

5. We talk with our hands; therefore we would have to put our
weapons down.

6. We would ALL want to fly the plane.


We are safe from the blacklist


ma fi shi ghalat

Un Ministre Libanais va en voyage officiel en France, et il est invite à diner chez son homologue francais. En voyant la somptueuse villa de ce dernier, et toutes les toiles de maître aux murs, il lui demande comment il peut bien s'assurer un tel train de vie avec sa paye somme toute modeste de serveur de la Republique.
Le Francais l'entraîne pres de la fenêtre :
- Vous voyez l'autoroute là-bas ?
- Oui - Elle a couté 20 milliards, l'entreprise l'a facturée 25 et m'a versé la différence. Deux ans plus tard, le Ministre Francais est en voyage officiel au Liban et rend visite à son homologue. Quand il arrive chez lui, il decouvre un palais comme il n'en avait encore jamais vu.
Stupéfait, il demande:
- Mais je ne comprends pas. Il y a deux ans, vous trouviez que j'avais un train de vie princier, mais par rapport a vous...
Le ministre Libanais l'entraîne près de la fenêtre :
- Vous voyez l'autoroute la-bas ?
- Non...

mich fèhim !
tarjaméni iza bétridé

Elle a dit que ta blague était nulle, et qu'elle en veut une autre

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tayib, la7za StylisH !

Tony, a Lebanese businessman, talks to his son.

Tony: I want you to marry a girl of my choice
Son: I will choose my own bride
Tony: But the girl is Bill Gates's daughter
Son: Well, in that case...

Next Tony approaches Bill Gates
Tony: I have a husband for your daughter.
Bill Gates: But my daughter is too young to marry
Tony: But this young man is a vice-president of the World Bank.
Bill Gates: Ah, in that case...

Finally Tony goes to see the president of the World Bank.
Tony: I have a young man to be recommended as a vice-president.
President: But I already have more vice-presidents than I need.
Tony: But this young man is Bill Gates's son-in-law.
President: Ah, in that case.....

A man dies and goes to hell. There he finds that there is a different hell for each country. He goes first to the German hell and asks what they do there. He is told: "First they put you in an electric chair for an hour. Then they lay you on a bed of nails for another hour. Then the German devil comes in and whips you for the rest of the day."
The man does not like the sound of that at all, so he moves on. He checks out the USA hell as well as the Russian hell and many more. He discovers that they are all more or less the same as the German hell.
Then he comes to the Lebanese hell and finds that there is a very long line of people waiting to get in. Amazed he asks: "What do they do here?"
He is told: "First they put you in an electric chair for an hour. Then they lay you on a bed of nails for another hour. Then the Lebanese devil comes in and whips you for the rest of the day."
"But that is exactly the same as all the other hells- why are there so many people waiting to get in?"
"Because there is never any electricity, so the electric chair does not work; someone stole all the nails, and the devil used to be a government employee, so he comes in, punches his time-card and then goes back home..."

Bon celle là juste histoire de me faire taper dessus par StylisH !

How does a Lebanese commit suicide?
By jumping from his ego to his IQ.

Et j'évite de vous envoyer les Abu Abed jokes qui sont pas toutes du meilleur goût je trouve

snif, StylisH mich mawjuda !

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